


nice

by onhojongtaekey



Category: SHINee
Genre: Body Dysmorphia, Body Worship, Fluff, M/M, Partial Nudity, Praise, i guess, jongkey - Freeform, not nsfw but intimate, this is only rated as teen bc its more . intimate?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-06-13 21:20:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15373563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onhojongtaekey/pseuds/onhojongtaekey
Summary: you were better than i was ready for





	nice

**Author's Note:**

> CW: body dysmorphia, mentions of self harm (scratching)

It wasn’t Jonghyun’s best day, to put it lightly. Everything from his lips to his thighs felt gross and out of place beneath his fingertips. He felt small and in the worst way. Gross and unworthy and just plain unattractive. He picked apart his body, physically and mentally, as he stood in front of the mirror, clad in just a pair of boyshorts and a loose tank top. Staring at his reflection only had him grow more and more uncomfortable with his disproportionate waist and hideous hands and everything else that made him feel out of place in his skin. It was painful to say the least.

“I hate this,” he mumbled to himself, pulling at his waist.

“And this,” stretching the skin around his hips.

“This.” his thighs.

“This.” his stomach.

“This. This. This. This. All of this.”

It seemed as though no amount of clawing and pulling and stretching of his skin would get him out of the confines of it.

_Scrub it off scrub it off scrub it off._

The shower. It never worked, but the incessant scrubbing and scraping and burning made his body hurt, feeling _right_ and in control at making his mental anguish over his body translate into a physical one. Fumbling through his drawers for clothes that he could hide his body in after he showered, Jonghyun grew frustrated to find that everything seemed to be too small or too showy and showed off the worst parts of the World's Worst Body and he was so _aggravated_. Angry tears threatened to drop from his eyes, lip quivering in the shape of a scowl as he walked out of his room and into Kibum’s.

“I’m taking some clothes, showering,” Jonghyun mumbled to the younger boy, who was lying on his bed reading an old novel.

Kibum looked up from his book to see the frustrated look on Jonghyun’s face, nose red from fighting back tears and neck blotchy from being scratched and pulled at so much. It was one of those days again, and though they had come less often than before, Jonghyun’s state was no less terrifying. He put his book down immediately, getting up from his bed and walking over to the smaller.

“Hey baby,” Key spoke softly, still trying to gauge how Jonghyun might react, “do you want to talk?”

“Wanna shower,” Jonghyun said, looking for Kibum’s light green long sleeved shirt.

“I don’t think you should Jjongie… can we talk this out instead?”

“Wanna shower,” he repeated.

Kibum inched closer, chancing everything as he placed his arms lightly around Jonghyun’s middle and pressed his nose into his neck. Jonghyun’s breath hitched in his throat at the unexpected touch.

“Bum I feel gross. Get off of me.”

“Let’s talk babe.”

“I said I want to shower.”

“I’ll come with you.”

Jonghyun nudged his elbow against Kibum’s stomach, freeing himself from his grasp. “I feel gross Kibum. I wanna just shower okay? So I can get this grossness _off_ of me.” The wavering of his voice and the reddening of the tip of his nose betrayed his otherwise harsh tone.

“You’re gonna hurt yourself baby, please… come lay down with me. This time at least, okay?” And Kibum always says ‘this time at least’ when he catches Jonghyun like this. And Jonghyun always follows him, crumpling against the boy as Kibum draws small circles in the older’s back.

Kibum takes out his coziest pair of oversized sweats, the ones that make Jonghyun feel small and safe and secure in himself, the ones he’ll _never_ admit to loving as much as he does. “Come on love, let’s rest a bit okay?”

Jonghyun says nothing in reply, just takes Kibum’s hand in his as Kibum walks them both back to his bed. Kibum sets the clothes down on the nightstand and crawls over onto the bed, lying down comfortably, upper body leaned against the headboard. Jonghyun followed shortly behind and lied down stiffly next to him. Kibum chuckled lightly, not at him, more at the stranger-like intimacy he was providing. He took Jonghyun’s hand to guide him onto his lap so that Jonghyun was straddling him. Jonghyun looked so pretty like this, Kibum thought. He grazed his thumbs over Jonghyun’s sides lightly, more in an attempt to bring Jonghyun back to present-day than anything, knowing of the older’s habit to space out when he got like this.

“How are you feeling?” And Kibum knew, knew all too well how Jonghyun was feeling, needing nothing more than to just get the older to talk.

Jonghyun peered down at Kibum, shrugged his shoulders and replied with a simple “gross.”

“Jjongie,” Kibum said tentatively, “let me see you? Take this off for me,” he continued, tugging lightly at Jonghyun’s tank.

Jonghyun shook his head instantly, pulling his shirt back down. “It’s gross Kibum.”

“Please love?” Kibum tried again. “Let me see okay? I bet you look great, that you’re just hiding _all_ the goods from me under there,” he pouted. Jonghyun cracked a slight smile, at which Kibum was infinitely grateful for. Again, Key brought his hands to the bottom of Jonghyun’s tank top, tugging it up slightly and, when Jonghyun offered no resistance, even going as far as to lift his arms up, continuing until the fabric was completely removed.

“You look so good Jonghyun,” Kibum marveled, thumbs tracing over the soft yet defined lines of Jonghyun’s stomach, reaching upwards just that little bit more to ghost his fingers across the upper expanse of his chest. “So good, you look so good. You’re so perfect like this. So… so immaculate. You look better as the days pass.”

“Kibum.” Jonghyun’s face flushed slightly at the all-too-familiar words of praise. Every time they struck him as something entirely new.

“I’m so lucky,” Key continued, “so so lucky. My baby boy.” He brought Jonghyun closer, leaning in slightly to press a kiss to Jonghyun’s navel. “My precious and perfect boyfriend.” His sides. “You’re so stunning.” His upper chest. Kibum continued peppering kisses around the upper half of Jonghyun’s body, punctuating each with praise and admiration.

“Can you take these off for me?” Kibum motioned towards the boyshorts Jonghyun was wearing, thumbs hooked slightly into the waistband.

“I… it’s not, it’s—” Jonghyun started, words getting caught in his throat and lost on the tip of his tongue as Kibum applied just the slightest bit of pressure.

“Do you want me to?” Kibum inquired.

“It’s so.. Bummie it’s so _ugly_ down there. That's too much. It's too far it's the worst.. it’s the worst. It’s the worst.” Jonghyun’s pulse quickened as his breaths shortened, feeling overwhelmed and sad at the same time.

“Hey, Jjong.”

“I want it gone. I want it gone I want it all gone Bum I _hate this body_.”

Kibum drew Jonghyun in close to him, Jonghyun leaning into the younger’s form as Kibum pet at his hair comfortingly, cooing softly into Jonghyun’s ear little reassurances of “it’s okay,” “you’re okay,” “you’ll be okay.”

“My love,” Kibum started, using the pet name that never failed to make Jonghyun pout and turn to mush, “what is it you want the most right now?”

“I want to stop feeling so gross,” Jonghyun mumbled against Kibum’s shoulder.

Kibum offered a sad smile, one Jonghyun couldn’t see because of their current positioning, and continued, “I know baby. Let me help okay? You’ll feel better afterwards. Already have your nice and cozy clothes picked out and we don’t want them to go to waste right?”

Jonghyun still shook his head reluctantly against Kibum’s frame. “Gross Kibum. It’s gross Kibum. It’s so gross I’m so gross.”

“You’ve got the nicest back, Jonghyun,” Kibum said, drawing Jonghyun’s body back again so that he could look the older in the eyes. Kibum moved his hands to trail down the smaller’s back and continued with his words of praise. “You have the most amazing shape. You’re working out so hard, right? And it’s giving you all this nice tone and muscle. Your body is so nice, Jjong.” Kibum circled his thumbs into Jonghyun's sides, continuing. “Your proportions are so nice, you’re built so nicely. Everything about you is so _nice._ You have such a nice body, did you know that Jonghyun?”

If Jonghyun was going to be fixated on the word ‘gross,’ then Kibum was sticking to ‘nice.’

“Nice thighs,” Kibum spoke, running his hands up and down Jonghyun’s thighs that lie on either side of him, “your thighs especially, Jjong. They’re so nice. They suit you perfectly, they compliment your waist so well.” And Kibum was targeting each of Jonghyun’s weakest spots now, the parts of his body he stayed up agonizing over. Jonghyun stayed on top of him, struggling not to move an inch as tears started forming in his eyes, threatening to fall rapidly, to turn into sobs that would shake his body upon their release.

“Your lower body is so nice, hmm? Your nice and perfect waist? Makes it so easy to give you the biggest bear hugs, right Jjongie? And you love those.” Kibum’s voice comes out low and soft, a tone reserved only for Jonghyun. “You love how I can just come behind you and scoop your whole body into my arms, because you love to feel small and secure and safe, right Jjongie? Your body is so perfect for that. So perfect for everything because it’s _yours_. I wouldn’t have it any other way. It’s so nice. You’re so _nice_.”

“Bummie,” Jonghyun sniffles out, “please.”

“Please what angel?”

“Keep going. Please keep going.”

“I’m getting there sweetie,” Kibum reassures, bringing a hand up to wipe at Jonghyun’s now steadily falling tears. “Your hips,” he says, bringing his hands down to trace random shapes into Jonghyun’s sides, “are my favorite. They’re nice and slim, soft and firm at the same time and,” his voice drops, “I love pressing into them when we’re intimate together.”

Jonghyun gazes down at Kibum through bleary eyes, the younger still not having removed his eyes from Jonghyun’s hips. “You like them?” he manages, almost bewildered and certainly overwhelmed at the grossest part of his body being seen as nice.

“I love them,” Kibum replies, “I love your nice and small and perfect butt too. These little boyshorts you’re in,” he says, thumbs at the waistband again, “make it look so nice. So nice, Jonghyunnie. Your whole body, just so nice. Sculpted by the gods and then perfected by you. You’re so nice baby. You are everything there is to want and more. You are so perfect in every single way, Jonghyun.”

And Jonghyun’s been crying, breaking his rule and shaking softly against Kibum’s body.

“Lie down sunshine. Come here, come here,” Kibum coos, scooting downwards so that he’s laying flat, dragging Jonghyun down into his chest and smoothing his hands up and down Jonghyun’s back. “You’re so precious Jonghyun. Your body is so perfect, so wonderful, so out-of-this-world, so unique, so _you_ , so _nice_. I love every single bit of it. From head to toe, inside and out, there isn’t a single person in the history of anything to have ever been as perfect, as _nice_ as you.”

Jonghyun sags against Kibum, body going limp with tears. He snakes his arms around Kibum, dragging him in closer to his own frame and taking all of him in. They lie together like that for a while, neither of them minding the silence and both of them revelling in the closeness.

“Bum,” Jonghyun sighs out after his tears have mostly subsided.

“Yes baby?” Kibum replies sleepily, having almost dozed off like this.

“Can I change into your cozy clothes?”

“Of course my love.”

A pause.

“Can _you_ change me into them?”

Kibum smiles into Jonghyun, tightening his hold on him before relinquishing the touch. “Of course my love.”

The change into the sweats had been nothing short of silly and sloppy, punctuated by Jonghyun’s giggles in response to Kibum’s tickling his sides, Kibum peppering kisses onto every inch of skin he could reach, and continuous words of praise and adoration for Jonghyun the whole way through. Cuddling back into bed, Kibum and Jonghyun found themselves in a spooning position, Jonghyun immediately pressing his ‘nice and small and perfect butt’ against Kibum, earning him promises of later. As Kibum was dozing off, Jonghyun called out for his name in a sleepy voice.

“Kibummie,” he spoke softly.

“Mm?”

“I feel nice.”

Kibum smiled in his half awake state, wrapping his arms just the slightest bit tighter around Jonghyun, drawing him in closer if at all possible.

This, this was nice.

**Author's Note:**

> 2.1k words of kibum loving his bf's body.  
> summary insp. from "dvsn - body smile" please listen it's sooo good and sweet... based (loosely) on this thread: https://twitter.com/kimjnnghyun/status/787862004111446018  
> lmk if there's any errors i wrote this at like 2am lol


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